Last night on the Yankee broadcast, Michael Kay and Ken Singleton were talking about Miguel Cabrera and Victor Martinez and how Martinez “protects” Cabrera in the lineup. Which is funny because this line of thinking prompted me to write an entire senior thesis on lineup protection, with charts and graphs and regressions and some pretty involved analysis that proved quite definitively that, no, lineup protection is not actually a thing.
Now, let me just say that the YES network does an excellent job of broadcasting games. But, man, I would have enjoyed being in the booth last night. It would have been like that Marshall McLuhan scene in Annie Hall.
Michael Kay: Victor Martinez provides excellent protection for Miguel Cabrera!
Jeff: Well, no, lineup protection is a myth.
Kay: Wait a minute, why can’t I give my opinion? It’s a free country.
Jeff: You can give your opinion, but do you have to give it so loud? Aren’t you ashamed to pontificate like that? And the funny part of it is that you don’t know anything about lineup protection.
Kay: Really? Oh really? I’ve been broadcasting the Yankees for 20 years, I’ve watched thousands of games, I host my own ESPN radio show. So I think my insights into lineup protection have a great deal of validity.
Jeff: Oh do you? Well that’s funny because I happen to have my thesis right here, so let me just, come over here for a second.
Thesis: I heard what you were saying. You know nothing of my work. You mean my whole fallacy is wrong. How you got to broadcast anything is totally amazing.
Boy, if life were only like this.